Posts Tagged ‘rta’

The lighter side of Dubai

About Dubai..some may find this funny but there’s some truth in it..

Dubai is the land of the biggest, tallest, longest, widest, richest, fanciest, fastest…everything is … in the world.

They have the tallest residential towers in the world, the tallest restaurant in the world, the largest number of Malbaris in the world, the highest crane operator in the world.

If it does not grow in Dubai, they’ ll make it artificially – artificial ski slopes, artificial islands, artificial oasis,
coconut trees and lawns, artificial beaches, artificial economy.

Indians especially love it here because of the dirham-to-rupee value. Pakistani’s adore it.

The Egyptians come here because there is nothing to do in Egypt. No more pyramids to build either.

The Filipinos come here because they have no choice; theres nothing back home, not even dogs – they’ve been eaten up.

The Brits come here coz they have forgotten what it is to enjoy 3 meals a day in UK and nobody employs them there for the crap they give. .

The Lebanese come here to buy cars, dress to kill, wear Peter Pan shoes 10 sizes bigger than their feet, put 1 kg of gel on their heads and give everyone ball talk.

They’ll buy a 1980s Merc or BMW for 10k dirhams and drive the car like they’re sitting in the rear passenger seat, stretching their arms all the way to the steering wheel, giving you the piercing bald eagle look.

Russian girls come here for “fun”.

The Bangladeshis come here to serve you when you honk outside a Bakala (shop), but would not even look at you if you park and go inside to pickup yourself.

Now according to the government Dubai is Tax free. Of course, that is true. You only have to pay for the visa, medical, sponser, insurance, resident ID, Opening a bank account or even closing an account, Municipality, Sewerage, attestation of papers, translation of papers, driving license papers, lessons, Car license, testing, and …. but the salary is Tax Free.

Only, there is a Pay and Park scheme with 5000 parking lots, and 500,000 cars in the city, so where the hell do you park? And you are fined for wrong parking.

Toll has been introduced on many roads. You can avoid the toll tax by using alternative routes, but you’ll end up in a traffic jam because everyone is trying to avoid the toll tax.

If you have any government related work like medicals for visa or immigration, you have 2 options – Standard and Urgent Procedure. Standard takes 7 days and Urgent takes 1 day. The difference is 100-odd dirhams. Everyone goes for the urgent option and the Dubai government makes money, urgently.

If you switch jobs you get a work ban and to lift the ban you pay a huge penalty.

In Dubai, without a car you are paralyzed (you dont even get jobs if you dont have a car). But you ‘ll get your license in attempts ranging from 2 to 20. Each time you fail you have paid fees for Driving Classes & Driving Tests, which are 1000-odd dirhams. Imagine the money RTA makes.

Most of the expats live alone with families back home. So they spend much on phone calls. And call charges from Dubai are high.

Another odd thing about Dubai – no matter where you go or who you meet, you take down phone numbers. Everybody has everybodys number in Dubai. And everyone has a Visiting Card, whether you are a bootlegger, a masseuse, a hooker, a car cleaner, a watchman or a pizza delivery boy. Everyone knocks around with lots of cards in his or her wallet and one card in the palm. So whenever you shake hands with anyone in Dubai and let go, you end up with a visiting card in your palm.

If youre walking on the road and you ask someone the time, he’ll tell you 10:30, give you his card and say, I have new and second-hand watches.

At a restaurant when you are leaving they’ll say Here is my card, call us for home delivery.

If you’re below your building, you’ll meet those Chinese chicks giving you their cards, saying, Call us if you want DVDs.

If youre standing at a bus stop, a Pakistani will pull over in his 1980 Toyota Corolla, give you his card and say, If you want Pick-up & Drop Service, call me.

Dubai has amusing-looking buildings. Some have holes in them, some have giant balls on them, some look like aeroplanes, some look like sail boats, and, all of them reach into space with your window right in front of the moon.

Everyone in Dubai goes to malls. Not necessarily to shop. To beat the heat, go to a mall; business meeting, go to a mall; getting bored, go to a mall; want to take a leak or dump, go to a mall; want to do lukhagiri (little in your pocket, little in your mind), go to a mall. If you want to go for a picnic go to a mall.

Some Malbaris go home to Kerala, get married, and then come to a Dubai Mall’s for their honeymoon.

THAT…MY FRIENDS…..IS

DOO-BAI

More stations for Metro

Three more stations on the Red Line of the Dubai Metro were opened Saturday, bringing the total number of operational stations to 21. The new stations started receiving passengers as the metro operations started early morning at 6am. The newly opened stations included: World Trade Centre, GGICO in Al Garhoud and Noor Islamic Bank (Al Qouz) on Shaikh Zayed Road. Some 14 feeder buses have been deployed to link the new metro stations with the surrounding areas offering bus service with 13-20 minutes frequency. This brings the total feeder buses serving the stations to 152. The remaining eight stations on the Red Line of the Metro would open gradually in coming months.

Priceless

Fines or Parking ticket – the picture has 1000 words in it

SECRET TUNNEL

FROM GULF NEWS:

A Roads and Transport Authority (RTA) official said they weren’t aware of the tunnel which links Downtown Burj Khalifa to Al Mafraq Road and bypasses heavy Dubai Mall traffic congestion on Financial Centre Road (formerly Doha Road).

“We may have announced this already, but I’m not aware of it,” said the official. “It sounds like it will save drivers a lot of time.”

The official couldn’t say when the tunnel had actually opened.

Tunnel Location

Tunnel Location

4 lanes

4 lanes

“On busy traffic days, it can take a lot of time to go from Shaikh Zayed Road past Dubai Mall and down the road behind (Al Mafraq Road) to get to Dubai Exhibition Centre,” he said. “There is so much traffic at the [Dubai] Mall. This tunnel has made life much easier.”

Underage without Licence to DRIVE

Teenage Emiriti brothers killed in gruesome vehicle collision.

3 boys & two cars – 2 brothers and one solo – solo landed in hospital, brothers died at the scene.

Parents of 3 shall be prosecuted for gross negligence and their licence be black pointed.

090909 0909 PM (2100 hrs UAE time)

Dubai Driverless Metro

Dubai Driverless Metro

tonite at 090909 hrs the previliged elites of Dubai – UAE will be riding the Dubai Metro. The selected station to launch the metro is Mall of Emirates on Sh. Zayed Road. Among elite passangers, few of commoners selected through a ballot will be onboard as well. Tonite the Gulf State of Dubai will be 1st one of the region to have driver less mass transport system which is elevated & underground as well.

come 10 09 09 and it will be open for all.

Here Comes Dubai Metro

Dubai Metro operations begin on 09/09/09 with 10 stations on the Red Line
Sheikh Mohammed bin Rashid Al Maktoum, Vice-President & Prime Minister of the UAE -Visionary Ruler of Dubai, will officially launch Dubai Metro on 09/09/2009, starting with 10 key stations on the Red Line, namely: Rashidiya, Terminal 3 (Dubai International Airport), City Center, Al Rigga, Union, Khalid bin Al Waleed, Jafliah, Financial Center, Mall of the Emirates, and Nakheel Harbour & Tower.

Metro Fares – RTA all set to 090909 – 090909

The minimum Metro fare for a short trip for up to three kilometres will be Dh1.80 if a passenger is using a prepaid card. It will cost Dh2 if the passenger uses a standard single journey paper ticket.

The maximum fare for a single journey will be Dh6.50 when using a paper ticket and Dh5.80 when using the card.

The fares will be valid for trains, public buses and the water buses for a single journey. This means a passenger using the metro can continue his or her trip on buses without paying any additional fare.

The Roads and Transport Authority has provided various fare options to passengers including daily and monthly passes.

The daily pass will cost Dh14 for unlimited trips on the metro and public buses all over the city. The monthly passes range from Dh100 to Dh270.

Dubai Metro

Dubai Metro

Dubai Taxi

Just read on khaleejtimes.com that Cars Taxi has added 400 more taxis to their existing fleet of just 800 taxis.

My personal experiences with Taxis in Dubai at large is that you have to wait for something around minimum of an hour to get hold of a taxi. Either there is not taxi, or if there is a taxi, the driver does not stop to allow you to board it.

As the taxis move on, you have the other option of bus — the Dubai Bus. Now this also comes under RTA as the earlier one (the taxis). The buses are ON time — but not on all places. The site declared on all buses does not open at all !!! The RTA site has a link to dubai buses but the routes displayed there do not mention the stops at all.

The RTA needs a rewamp.

Terms of use | Privacy Policy | Content: Creative Commons | Site and Design © 2009 | Metroblogging ® and Metblogs ® are registered trademarks of Bode Media, Inc.